Men in Ads- Are they really all that stupid??

Do men ever get annoyed how they are portrayed as dumb idiots in most television ads? What an insult to women that the ad industry STILL thinks that women need them to give them a "pat on the back" for being a woman and make men the smaller of the two sexes in commercials and sitcoms. There are TONS of ads where the woman corrects the man/husband/boyfriend/father figure, or smirks while the man makes a mistake, and not many the other way around. If the ad industry is going to be at all modern, join us modern liberated women (this isn't 1974) and realize that giving us preferencial treatment in any sitcom, ads, etc is just insulting to us and does nothing to promote "equal rights" for women. In fact, it furthers the myth that we need help, and in the form of bad writing and lazy ideas, it's help we don't need.
Men and women are different. The term "equal rights" may apply to how we are to respected, paid, treated legally and morally: true- but we are different, not the same. Treat us as such, finally. There are stupid ignorant people on both Adam and Eve's playground. Every day, throwing shoes, pulling hair, bullying, preaching, laughing, making mistakes and acting like the tall hairless monkeys that we are.

Now write it into the script so we can get out from under your thumb, advertisers.

I am in a dark mood but it's cool so come on in...

My personal times are good (I keep some stuff for my private stash of bad things, not to be all let out at once or maybe never to the internet world), but I have had sad news from friends the past few days and am feeling for them today. Actually it's around midnight. Great time for some poetry to set us in the mood. And how about my last post huh? - some major spelling and grammar uh-ohs there but when I write, I move on usually and leave them be.

Whoever you are! motion and reflection are especially for you,

The divine ship sails the divine sea for you.

Whoever you are! you are he or she for whom the earth is solid and liquid,

You are he or she for whom the sun and moon hang in the sky,

For none more than you are the present and the past,

For none more than you is immortality.

Walt Whitman, A Song of the Rolling Earth

I posted this particularly to. That is all I am going to say about that. It's a wonderful piece of a poem. I don't know these things by heart- I physically get my books out from my shelves and put pens in them to keep them open in order to write on this blog. Some of these poetry books I have had since 1988. In my own slanted cursive writing, I took ownership of them, my constant friends. Genetics has a hand in writing, and mine takes after my father's all slanty to the right, lean, and somewhat uncomprehensible in my older age...this is due to computer use, not due to my father (;).

True Grit- a piece to chew on for days

Here goes another movie review: I am not going to rehash the story of "True Grit," a novel I first read when I was about 13 and which I must be honest, did not fall in love with. I liked the characters and remembered them throughout my later literary life, but thought the book dry, drawn out and bleak. Through the eyes of a 13 year old, this is no surprise. I was expecting some straight forward adventure and was spoiled by the Frank L. Baum books (Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz, etc.) and other series I owned like the Laura Ingalls Wilder books. I didn't know then, what I know now, thanks to writers like Charles Portis, Cormac McCarthy and Ernest Hemingway- a story doesn't have to end with fireworks or begin with a bang- it just happens, and the best writers leave the telling to the readers.
The latest rendition of this story I am very biased towards, only seeing parts of the one with beloved John Wayned playing Rooster Cogburn. So, that's all I can say about that. This one- made me believe again in the power of good writers, good directors, good actors and great stories.

Do not go to this movie expecting "The Big Lebowski on Red Bull During A Western Shootout". Although Jeff Bridges plays a highly incomprehensible Rooster Cogburn, he is funny without trying to be, is sad without knowing it, and it a true character in fiction without being a "character" (which is what alot of Coen Brothers movies include). It is a more subtle film, subtle being for the writing, the kind you have to lean into to hear. It is loud when it needs to be, suspenseful as any horror film, and is almost perfect in it's portrayal of the strange, barren, scraggly wasteland that is Arkansas, USA.

I've been through their alot traveling the last few years- its the state one must go through to get to anywhere else in the West unless you are already living around I-10 then you're just lucky. From Nashville, we had to use I-40 alot to drive west and it SUCKED. But, this film reminds you of the strange beauty of the time, some weird outposts, dugouts, stunted oaks and pines, snow falling in forests that aren't really forests...it is true to nature. It is the Missisippi basin area, without being at all "Southern".
I almost applauded at the end of the movie, as did some of the full theater we were in. The story of one girl's utter and complete goal of avenging her father's killer was consistant and very well played by an actress who didn't distract with some childlike poses or guiles. Matt Damon played "Le Beef" wink wink and I think he actually disappeared into the role (a good thing) compared to most roles he plays. Jeff Bridges completed the cast as Rooster, and does not disappoint. In fact, I think he won me over by not cleaning up at all. He shows a big belly, a mumbling whiskey voice, and greasy hairdo despite being called to be a hero at times during the film. It does not bode well that he gets so drunk he cannot relate to people but can still shoot a cornbread muffin out of the sky, but we root for him anyway.

Besides the characters, the story was a full affirmation in film making. It starts slow, builds, has a ton of great suspense and the editing was so nice for the shooting scenes. At times, I felt like I was watching "Pulp Fiction" and at times, "Unforgiven". It is that dark. It is a subtle dark, though, not out to "get" the viewer, but to let you enjoy several long moments before having a fast action one. It is a story that makes you think about certain scenes and wonder, and it leaves a few questions open.

I think that's a good thing, in this film. It concludes, but makes you want more. Why was that man hanging so high? Why was that man wearing a bear on his body? Who was he, really? What's with the dead man's body they kept trading? Why did Rooster keep kicking those children of their porch? Was that cool - no..Why did "LaBeef" feel the need to whip up on Maddy Ross? As I believed through the book, he lived by a simple but old fashioned rule- young people didn't need to be petulant to their elders..which is consistant throughout his future actions, which is why the film is so awesome. The characters never waver. EVER.
These things need ruminating. Go see the movie.

Dealing with High School Friends You See at the Bar When You're Home for the Holidays

Click link below...hilarious.
Dealing with High School Friends You See at the Bar When You're Home for the Holidays

Can someone

Please tell Faith Hill (who I just saw singing on a Public Channel Christmas Special) that although she has a really great deep throaty voice, it would better be served by just singing, and not all dolled up with fake eyelashes, fake extensions, and a sprayed on tan. I have seen her in concert in Nashville with her husband Tim McGraw. I have seen over 40 live acts, and they were in the top ten- for real. I know alot of my peers diss on the country performers, but these guys are the real deal for a live show.

I like his songs more than hers- purely because hers are very "pop" oriented, whereas his are straightforward country ( and anything straightforward is totally my thing. In any capacity). I just would say, if I was her manager- lay off the "glamour" and let people hear you, not LOOK at you. She's got a kick ass voice, but it's always distracting to see her in boots, big hair, and even when she kindof gets natural, it's a sprayed on "natural".
Oh jeez, the CoolTv channel we love here in Clearwater/Tampa is playing some crazy stuff now. We love this channel- it's like MTV back in the early days. It's cable/ antennae access and it's all videos all the time. It will jump from Journey to Goldfrapp in four minutes. Love it!
Music reborn.

Faith, take note. As all the other women singers out there. Be yourself. If you go to bed every night with false eyelashes, then so be it. But if you just need to sing and want to be heard, leave half the makeup at home. We will hear you.

Clara McCarthy

Every few weeks, I go to see my grandmother, Clara McCarthy. When Phillip and I first visited her as a married couple, her and Grandpa were still living in their wonderful bay front/ back yard with lake house on Bayshore Drive in Safety Harbor ( the road that leads up to Courtney Campbell Causeway to Tampa). This was around 2004, when we were still renting a house in PC and would come to visit Clearwater where I have TONS of relatives. It was a home of my father's from his youth ( he lived his younger years in Illinois) and had lots of memories of visits there. My sister and I would feed their fish that lived in HUGE saltwater tanks - exotic fish, many tanks, stacked up on a wall, and would play their organ. We would feed their fish, go out back to see if their friendly birds would come to say hello, we would gaze at their huge oil paintings they were so talented at doing their entire lives, we would watch "Jeopardy" with them, eat dinner, play some cards, play ping-pong in their garage, and I always remember how Grandpa looked- lanky, sauve, satisfied, a constant smile/smirk that let you always think he found life amusing.

Grandma used to have golden hair, wore coral lipstick, served sherbet for desert. I was never uncomfortable with them, and loved looking at the things they would bring home from cruises to Mexico or hear about the latest concert pianist they saw at Ruth Eckert Hall ( a big music hall here).
From their living room, you could see Tampa Bay. It was beautiful.
When I see Grandma now, she retains a regal poise, hands folded. She recieves hugs gently, and we repeat our names so that she knows us. She seems to remember Nick, as he is older now and not as squawky as he used to be, and Jude she just likes to pat on the head. Nick gives her lots of hugs now, and seems to understand that she is "Pappy's mom". We went into her room at St Mark's and I showed Nick her oil paintings hung on the wall. He climbed on her bed, and traced them with his small hands. He knows I also do oil paintings, with alot more texture ( I love glopping on the oils to the point of 3-D) and so I said he could also do this if he liked. We left her some tokens of love- some chocolates, some crafts from his school, some photos. We left her room to rejoin her in the dining room where all the Alzheimer's patients sit and eat. I told her her newly curled hair looked great, held her hand, wondered at how great the menu looked, spoke to the staff, and enjoyed how many patients always come speak to our children.
I usually have Phillip there with me on these trips, but went ahead without him today as he was working and I felt an urgency there.
My grandmother remembers alot. She speaks about her farm in Illinois with my grandfather. She mentions my dad was a great son. She speaks of his three other sisters, and I relate to her any information I have on my three aunts and all my cousins on that side ( there's alot of cousins!). She asks again who are my sons, and I tell her. She speaks about the food and that it's nice. I think about the oil paints and brushes that were given to me when her home was sold and how I paint with them now and how it moves me every time I push that oil onto canvas.

She is not really here. But she is still here. I am grateful for that so that my sons can know her now. I sometimes feel that there is a reason why Phillip got a good job transfer offer from Nashville to Tampa, it is so that I can spend time with all three of my grandparents who I have so many memories with, and so that my sons can know them also. What a gift! My other grandparents, the McMullens, are very much a part of our lives here and enjoy family gatherings often. I am so grateful, as I have always felt a special bond with my Mamaw.

My Grandma McCarthy, she is unique. She is of the midwestern sensibility. She is quiet, she is highly intellectual and had tons of crosswords, sci-fi, science journals, and world books (i.e National Geographics, and Readers' Digest books on ancient cultures and archealogy- one of the reasons why I originally majored in archealogy! ). She and Grandpa had their routines, their favorite places we would dine at (Paradise Cafe for example). They would act slow but then beat you in a second in a game of cards and chuckle with amusement as they gave you a bowl of dessert while Grandpa reshuffled.

Grandma kept alot in her head, and didn't feel the need to prove alot by debating or wearing her heart on a sleeve. I have tried to remember this aspect of her as a learning point for myself. I remember her specifically questioning a religious subject at one time, and I knew "She is one of the smartest women I will ever know." Not because it was religion, but because she was of an inquiring mind, and very much so...I would always read the books they had on ancient cultures and I knew I had more than genes in common with them...

So, if you can't remember everything all the time, Clara, let us do some remembering for you. I will never forget.

WALMART HURTS MY BRAIN.

WALMART- the neon superhighway of Santa's little helpers. I just left a Walmart. I try to avoid the bigger stores if at all possible. Not because I think I'm too hip for them, or because I dislike massive examples of capitalism (on the contrary), but because of their generic output.

The past few months, I have used a nearby one for some basic grocery/paper good type items, then we hit a produce stand once a week for TONS of fresh fruit, veggies, cheese, dry beans, oriental noodles, Indian sauces and other pieces and parts for great meals.

However, I had to admit that Walmart was a nice place to get the Christmas type stocking stuffers, candy, makeup items, shampoos, etc. UGG. The real thing that leaves a slimy mark on these visits is the utter generic quality to EVERYTHING in their store (same goes for Target, who tries to be "cooler" but really is just more expensive and cuter). I could buy a gift for someone at a Clearwater Walmart, and someone in Nosepick, Kansas might get the SAME exact present under their tree.

Soo...lucky friends and family of mine- besides some Generic but nice chocolates, peppermints, or cards, all of your gifts will NOT be from Walmart.
Generic Christmas avoided!!

Now, if only I could reinvent the capitalism wheel and figure out how to keep corporations from becomming so....generic. I assume if people frequented more unique stores and locally owned places, there would be more interesting items for the public to choose from (as proven through internet shopping). Then...as most people know, as the companies become more popular, their items become more generic (and cheaply made)..the vicious cycle continues. If only creativity AND profit could find a happy partnership - all of us would reach across the aisle, hold hands, and turn our country "purple". Even the middle. Where Walmarts DEFINE a town. I mean, if you don't have a Walmart, are you really a city?

Is it too early for a beer?

What is there to say.. there is alot of mortality type stories going on in our lives right now isn't there? Are we ok, are our parents ok? Did we ever think (graduating from Bay High 1990's) that we would ever be where we are? What does that mean... I don't think we are "old" like alot of some female cohorts seem to think. No, I don't think 36 or around that age is "old" so get over yourselves. However, it is an age of some first reflection. Some of us still have the wonderful gift of great grandparents around. Some of us are just happy to have parents. It's an in-between stage. Full of hope for the future for ourselves but also slowly filled with the realization that our family life is changing.

People have health problems, people need our help in general.
It's ok, take charge, be that person. And don't wait for someone else in the family to visit the lonely or to do something that needs to be done. Don't be that person! Anyone can make excuses for why they don't visit enough, etc and there are some good real reasons, but there is always something we, as a younger generation, can do.
Find it. Find that something you can do for an elderly family member, even if from mail or a phone call. Life is short. It's good, but it's short :)

hello Party Animals

What's going on cats and dolls? Here about the school board shooting in Bay County Fl? There are so many shootings where we currently live on the news that you become used to it, but up in the nether regions, not so much crime. I know, give it time....but by then most of the country will be living like we might some day soon- on wheels, traveling wherever, seeing the country, and staying away from the suburban anger, self loathing and smug elitism that has taken over our good country.

Message to now defunct man who waved a gun around at my friend's mother and mumbled some diatribe that is yet to be determined- everyone has bad days, some of us just know how to deal with life better. Perhaps something we don't know about hurt you so deeply you felt justified to act out, but hurting innocent people doesn't make your case.

too sad about that whole story. I am sure there is more to it than the press is letting on- specifically, that he probably had some personal contacts or issues with some of those board members before, and had his own nasty reasons for doing what he did. What a sad case.

On to better things- I know we all get wrapped up in buying our kids presents, making good food, attending church services, and traveling to see family each year. Remember there are easy ways to help the homeless and those who are in shelters. Most local county shelters would LOVE any extra blankets, sheets and pillows you can wash and donate. You can also call to see if you can buy/sponsor a Christmas dinner (usually only $25 or so per meal) so that someone has a full plate of hot food. You can drop off warm winter clothes at any charity organizations on your way out of town, or you can do the very easy Pick an Angel charity where you sponsor a child's Christmas with toys for them to be surprised with.

It's a great gift for you own children, and for yourself too- the lesson of giving and reaching out beyond our own small worlds. Find the time! You have the heart...

Click on link below from The Daily Beast

hello, I already wrote to a Panama City conservative talk show host about this a month ago. My header was "Why not? Noone knew who Clinton or Obama was (on the national radar) before they ran for something huge. It's not at all implausible". Interesting games, politics. and I love playing!!


The GOP's Veep Favorite

"%$#@! My Dad Says" excerpts from Justin Halpern

29 year old Justin Halpern ended up with a best selling memoir and a CBS sitcom based in his family due to his book "Sh*t My Dad Says." Although I don't watch much network tv, thus haven't seen this show yet, I loved the excerpts from his memoir. A few are listed here:

On friendship: "You've got good friends. I like them. I don't think they would fuck your girlfriend, if you had one"

On getting a job at Hooters: "You, my man, are not as dumb as I first fucking suspected."

On finding his porn stash: "You shouldn't have left that porno in the VCR. Your penis betrayed you son. Made you think stupid. Won't be the last time that happens."

On his trip to Europe: "I know you think you're going ot get all kinds of laid. It's not a magic place, it's the same as here. Don't be stupid."

On furnishing one's home: "pick your furniture like you pick a wife, It should make you feel comfortable and should look nice, but no so nice that someone would want to come along and steal it."

On Chilvary: "Give your mother the front seat..I don't give a shit if she said you could have it. that's what she's supposed to do, and you're supposed to say, 'No, I insist.' You think I'm going to drive around with my wife in the backseat and a 9 year old son in the front? You crazy son of a bitch."


Just spreading the holiday cheer!! Maybe this will make you say "my parents were pretty normal after all"

Authors choose their favorite books of 2010

Authors choose their favorite books of 2010

New Gadgets

if you look to the right side of this page, you will notice that I have a few new gadgets. You can play the guitar (it's awesome), look at new campfire photos for relaxing on a winter night, view Rothko art on bottom of page, and also use your cursor to feed the fish (it really works).

Mindless entertainment for days...

a little moment

"There is more to life than increasing its speed."- Mahatma Gandhi

Reuse & recycle information

Another great company found: Gazelle.com will pay you for your used electronics and send a stamped box so you can mail items like old cell phones, laptops, cameras and other electronic items for free.

Easy, and great for extremely lazy or busy people !!

We love the Fitz.

Forgotten is forgiven. - F. Scott Fitzgerald

Think about that for a moment. It's common sense, but isn't it nice when someone puts it in such a simple way?

Tampa Int'l Auto Show

was like a bedazzled indoor parking lot with lots of cool people, freebies, and entertainment for the kids. I suggested it to my husband, and now that we have been, recommend it for anyone who just wants something different to take their family to. Ending on a preposition has never been my thing, however, the show was classy, easy to get around, and I had fun. I have always been into design- i still have drawings I did in middle school age of "fashion"- dresses, etc. for the runway. I love architectual design (went Gaga over Miami over any other big cities I have been to, and I've been to alot). Cars don't always call out to me, but there are some designs that sing. I don't care about cost, or even who makes them, I am all about the instant impression with cars. There are people who live in tents who own a Porsche because they just think that it will bring them some type of cache. (kindof like some, ahem football fans, or fair weather political voters). Then there are the car fans like me - all about the beauty and design. Now, what I just said was totally contradictory- if someone loves a Porsche, and that's what they just need to have, then good for them.

Function is key, but HOW is the function built. How are the mechanics hidden, or if they are full view, how do they fit into the build of the car? These are things I look at. Just like a house.
For the first year in a while, the Jaguar company did not show up to this show. economy, blah blah blah we were told. Better they stay in their pedestal in the sky among the autos on high than be dragged down I-75 etc to sully their wings. I understand. Everytime we have to use 75 for some reason (rarely, and never to go home) I feel the need to dust off the cow dung mist and semi- dust.
Oh well, it was still very cool. And next up, we are going to the newly renovated Tampa Museum of Art. My parents always took us camping, to museums and to cities with alot to offer while visiting and we have done the same with our children. So...design and great minds ahead!

Herbie Hancock & Lang Lang - Rhapsody in Blue - Classical Brits 2009

Thanks Mo'Boma

for freezing Fed worker's pay for a few years. I can't rag on you too much because Republicans have done this in the past also. It's just, jeez, man...my husband goes into work at 6 am sharp daily and takes care of those planes up there in the sky. we could have used a that small annual pay increase the next few years. But hey, take some from here, put in there. Hope whoever gets that small amount of money uses it wisely (and not on wic stuff like cheetos-now, bananas and apples, that's fine with me.)

Kenny Powers and the Power of Cussing, Brawling, Drugs and General Mayhem

"Eastbound and Down" is a must see for anyone who enjoys the pasttime of cultural observation like I do. I really enjoy shows that portray a slice of life to a well written "t". And this show does that as much as any high- brow show with more high culture.."high" being a big word here.
When Kenny Powers returns to his hometown, an overblown, washed out baseball "star" who pulls up to his brothers house with all his possessions in a small u-haul and his beloved jet-ski on the back, we know we're in for a comedic treat. Immediately, he's spewing racial slurs, snorting coke like disco is still around, patronizing local bar sluts, and even saying the most un-attractive things to his ex-love April (his sweet but more mature high school love). With every line, Powers takes himself down a rung, and somehow we root for his redemption. He is the "bad guy" who doesn't know how ugly he really is, and this wonderful fact is what makes him different from the other major players via Showtime and HBO- he is not "self aware" like Tony Soprano seems to be, he does not have time to go to a counselor after doing ecstasy during the local high school prom (where he has been hired as a coach)...he's too busy reuniting with old friends, smoking lots of dope, snorting coke and trying his hardest to fight against own present self- which is older, overweight, unhealthy, and full of regret over his blown baseball stardom.
Kenny Powers is the person we can relate too, perhaps not due to being overweight, a druggy or a local prostitute soliciting jet ski rider, but we can relate to his subconscious effort to hang on to his youth. He doesn't do it right at all- he does things that contribute to a fast death, he insults people he doesn't understand, and he disregards the ones who are allowing him to mooch off of them. However, through it all, he is a strange hero to root for, and somehow the writers allow us to do so without feeling like scum.

We love you Kenny Powers...have yet to catch up on Season 2, but hear you are in Mexico doing God knows what and hopefully not calling every there muchachos and stinking burritos. I hope you've blown off the blow and gone back to that girl :) NOT THE ONE FROM THE BAR THAT WENT TOPLESS JET SKIING WITH YOU.

New Gulf Oil Spill Info - The Daily Beast

New Gulf Oil Spill Info - The Daily Beast

Elsewhere

We all have moments we wish we could relive, in each brilliant moment- the times we were most joyous, most excited, most surprised, most peaceful or most passionate. What were those for yourself? Could you name a few? Can you take a moment to remember them now? What if your life ended sooner than later?
What made you happy?
Was it recent events or something when you were six years old? Did music play a role? Did your words escape you at the moments you should have spoken up? hmm. this one is a big one for lots of us.
I often wonder things like this while doing the mundane- the cleaning up after little finger dinners, after naps, and after trips to the beach. I always have had a running stream of thoughts going on while my life is being taken care of and being lived, and even being lived in a happy peaceful mindset I still have these thoughts.

I am not alone. This I am assured in many ways. However, I often wonder how many out there are also living a life fulfilled and yet are still filled with questions. Why are we given these years to enjoy the pleasures of live with a sure end to it? Is Faith the answer or is just enjoying every moment full of our own pleasures Heaven on Earth? Why are we not allowed to live several lives at once?

I ask these questions to my soul mate, Phillip, who understands me totally but as is normal, cannot read my mind and cannot answer my questions. He looks at me with eyes full of love and says things like "you are very special" and " I love you" and " you are so beautiful", which is great. BUT, and there's always a BIG BUT- he knows what I am saying, but just has no answers.
I don't expect anyone to. At least we talk about these things, on some nights, for hours on end- him, secure in a peaceful place of calm and relaxation- me, in a place of bouncing stars and endless speculation.

Jeez, the universe is not big enough for my questions. So, I relent. One night is passing, and another day is comming. So little time for so many inquiries. I must let go, for a short time, and save my thoughts for dreams. I don't have them every night (that I remember) but when I have them- they are like I have lived a whole night in another life. Some mornings, I feel I have come awake in a new land, only to discover it's our land. Usually, after an hour, Phillip enjoys the surprise in my eyes when I realize I am back from "wherever it was that I was".

Good night! The full moon is waning soon so enjoy while you can. And give everyone you love a great hug and kiss ;)

thanks for the reminder Ben

You keep on saying the past is not dead - well, stop and smell the smoke.

from Ben Folds- excellent pianist and modern composer.

Potter and his serious white boy game

I just saw the latest Harry Potter movie in the theaters in Pensacola Fl while visiting the wonderful in-laws. It was THE BEST ONE EVER. I always watched the last three with the growing feeling that I was seeing something FINALLY being written for someone over 10 years old. Now, keep in mind I have not yet read any of the books, I didn't on purpose, once I realized the movies were being made. I'm weird like that. Anyway, I love to read, but wanted to have at least one series of popular novels that I did not know anything about. David Yates and company (director, writers, set designers and creative staff) finally seemed to realize that the Harry Potter story (much like the dumbed down Dorothy and Oz series) was really meant for somewhat more sophisticated viewers, and that you can do a film to please many at once.

For once- I was really seeing the evil side of the "one we must not speak of", and for once, the Harry Potter crew is out of the safety of their college / wizard school and in a mid- apocalyptic world of empty streets, quiet skies, and crowds quickly dispersed by evil clouds of wrong- minded folk. You know the drill - the cool thing is- this film takes it to a whole different level.
Also, there are real moments of decent acting between the cast members. Not just the major ones, but the entire entourage of Weasleys, etc. There are enough moments to let the viewer remember things of the past, a stunt not often pulled in this time of fast paced action sets. It let's the viewer into the scenery, and enjoy any new action with a renewed sense of "why" and of purpose.

When you have a series this long, it's hard to keep up the momentum. We have the entire set so far at home, and it's interesting to see how the different directors shifted momentum half way through the novels. I love the latest movie. It's emotional, it's full of gravity, and lets go of any cutesy novelties to pull you in- by now, if you don't get Harry Potter- now is the time to "get it".

And...on a long winter night...see the previous films to enjoy the journey. The latest film is by far the best. It's the darkest, the most mature, and the themes of Nazis, pure-bloods, and similar dogma will have your radar pricked for hours. Hello ! Harry has finally landed on the shores of ethnic cleansing- will he make it out or save the world from it ?

Only those who've read it know- so don't tell me please, I've got half a year left until I know what happens...

Hell yeah I have nine followers

The Tudored

We finally finished the Tudors series. What an outstanding piece of historical drama. If you have never seen it, please treat yourself. It's written for adults, by adults, no filters or PG type writing. It's at times hard to watch, but the actors give every moment their utter respect and treat their lines like works of art. See it.

Now, how are you dear friends? Are you happy, are you tired, are you well in the soul? Sometimes, we can be all those at once, I have found. Have you counted your blessings lately and held some in your arms? When I was single and living alone at times, quite happy in a one bedroom garage place, I would fall asleep with a book in my hand. Waking up later in the night to turn off my reading lamp (which I still have) I would never feel lonely if I had read a good deal of a good book, poem or even just a pile of zines.

transitional pause.

Last night, I had one of those really weird long dreams that started at 5 am (when I woke up briefly and glanced at clock) and continued after going back to sleep intil 6:45. It was one of those that is in "real time" and was so realistic. I have those every few nights, and it makes my mornings a little strange. I feel like I have been elsewhere ( although i know clearly it was a dream) and it's hard to shake off. In fact, it affects my day until i get busy enough to push the dream out of my mind. They are never bad dreams, just realistic and very very detailed. I do not even think I have that much memory in my waking life.

By now you're like "Hey Jennifer tell me what the dream was about" but I cannot let the story out of the bag. They are usually too real and at the same time too strange to ever be able to explain without someone getting a vibe. Usually, they do include people in my life, present and past and always seem like it could have truly happened...plausable stories with real outcomes. Never too much to handle but definitely with some real emotions from everyone involved.

Is this the way the mind works? Exorcising our own underlying emotions while we sleep? Yes, we know this. But is it more? no, doubt it. Mostly just a mix of weariness, real memories and false "memories" combining into one dramatic time in the night.

The mind is a wonderful thing, a best friend at times. Sometimes, perhaps...more of a nanny telling you to really, truly "go to sleep, now love."

Pre pay for this!!

Kentucky Lemonade

I know many of my Southern pals know this one by heart, but it's fun to revisit and share some good things:

1 can frozen lemonade concentrate, thawed
2 cups orange juice
1 container frozen lemon juice from concentrate, thawed
1 pt. bourbon, chilled
1 (2-liter) bottle lemon-lime soft drink, chilled
1 (1-liter) bottle club soda, chilled
Garnish with lemon slices

ENJOY and swing on your mama's front porch like noone's business.

The Unbanked

There's an interesting article in Newsweek that I thought to summarize for you loyal readers and it has some insightful tips in it if you are looking to invest in "future" type ideas.

The nutshell is this: Daniel Gross wrote in Newsweek's Oct 25 issue that companies like NetSpend based in Austin TX, are going to to do well- here's why: they are a company that offers pre-paid debit cards that are for the millions of "unbanked" in our country. Ever been to a SuperWalmart and see the long lines that wait in their bank/stamps/ etc line? These are the unbanked- the people who do not have a bank account, or credit (due to personal reasons like being new immigrants or people who just have bad credit and need to have cash to pay some bills). NetSpend's revenues are now at $18.2 million from $700,000 from 2005 to 2009. Green Dot is the company in bed with Walmart. Walmart even pays some of its employees with Green Dot loaded debit cards.

This is the new thing- the pre-paid class. It is growing. Tracfone Wireless has 15 million prepaid subscribers in the US alone and is based out of Mexico's America Movil. Some people see this as a sign of economic regression. However, many, like the author Gross, see this as a positive sign of the U.S.'s business class learning to adapt, which is a sign of progression, rather than a status quo type model. He argues that this may be a new learning tool for us all - learning to buy what you need on a cash only model rather than a credit based market that puts people behind from the beginning of their purchasing habits.
I agree...going prepaid or cash only has alot of benefits- the best being that one learns to buy as needed, not as "wanted."
As he ends his article, he writes "Pay now, buy later."

Bucket List

Yes, of course we knew it was comming. If you knew you had a few weeks to live- what would you do? I would:

1. Make sure I wrote letters to each of my sons, specifying how I expect them to treat women, the world and how much I love them. There would be ALOT to say.
2. I would really like to go out West again to see the open ranges full of cactus, sky, rocks and multicolored sunsets. It's been a few years!
3. I would swim in the Gulf of Mexico as much as possible...long laps, not just floating around.
4. Spend as much time as possible with my grandparents, it's a lucky thing to have most of them still here with us, the exception being my wonderful Grandpa McCarthy, who I think of often.
5. Spend a night out dancing with my husband. I love dancing, I even do it in my own living room whenever I feel like it.
6. Forgive those who trespassed against me, and vice versa.
7. donate alot of money to charities that help people get on their feet for homes, jobs, family life, etc.
8. Fish fish fish for flounder, grouper, whatever. Actually I would take a deep sea charter boat with friends and reel some good things in to eat fresh that evening.
9. Eat oysters and scallops from Bay County.
10. Write to past teachers who influenced me.
11. Lay out on a nude beach as much as possible, for days if possible. Even if it takes going on one of those cheesy FL cruises you can take (because Fl doesn't have many nude beaches left, alas, mustn't scare the tourists you know)
12. I would really like to visit Vienna Austria where my great grandmother Anna Daeger came from, and also Scotland where the McMullens are from. Also, learn more about the McCarthy/Carter side of family to that my sons know more about their history.
13. I would like to meet Cormac McCarthy and tell him "thank you" for his novels. They are stark, beautiful and leave such an impression. Hemingway and Fitzgerald have left the building so they are not on this bucket list.
14. I would make sure my parents know how happy I am to have them as parents, and how much I admire and adore them. Also what great parents they are and say thank you for taking us on so many family trips and adventures.l
15.My husband would know how much he means to me, and how happy he has made me and our family. there really are no words....

Damn, that's getting depressing. I didn't mean for it to be.
What would you do? There is no list that would really cover it for me....life is sweet isn't it? Enjoy every moment today!

this is a crazy statistic:
Last year in Pinellas County, more people died from prescription narcotics overdoses than died from automobile accidents.

That's alot of people in alot of pain, and a very sad growing trend in our society. I think younger people need to be taught better coping skills, and healthy ways to deal with emotional, financial and social stress in order to avoid relying so much on prescription pills to deal with life. Public education should evolve with our society, and include more classes on emotional health so that young adults grow into adults who can handle problems without needing so many destructive coping mechanisms.

That's my two cents for this morning.

Gym Rats, Gym Groupies, and Me

Ok, So I joined a gym here in our fair city a few months back. As with every time we have joined a gym where we have lived, it's always an interesting place to observe human behavior and reflect on my own love/dislike relationship with my own body. I was raised with a good amount of self confidence to due my caring parents and never had a problem with my somewhat short curvy stature until...some evil person sent an anonymous letter with honest to God magazine cut-out letters to my parents house that stated something along the lines of " eat a salad..." Now, to make things clear:
1. I never told my parents or friends about this.
2. I never found out who sent it.
3. This was in 1990 right after we moved from our Pretty Bayou address to a somewhat more affluent neighborhood of Kings Point..where we had a pool in a very private backyard where I would lay out and swim, assuming I was not being watched by some troll. Let me correct- Pretty Bayou has many expensive homes but I am pointing out the higher bully/competitive/mean girl quotient went way up upon this move.
4. Being a lover of water, swimming and boating, I had never been afraid to wear swim suits until this weird letter was opened with much surprise in my bedroom.
5. After this, for my entire high school life, I wore board shorts etc when swimming or boating with friends (among family members I was always very happy to be myself).
6. This incident was strange because I could never figure out who would send that to me...at the time I had really close, long term friendships with girls I loved and trusted.
7. I always suspected it was someone who I didn't really know, perhaps someone who was jealous that I always had a steady stream of questionable but really cute boyfriends. Perhaps a King Point beauty queen who felt better by hounding me instead of living her own life?
8. Thus...though still quietly very confident of my own body due to my own undiminished self esteem and many many compliments from men who loved my curves...I grew into a woman who was 98% good with herself- sucks that someone else took that 2% and never gave it back.

Here we are- gym time. Really, wanted to get that little secret off my chest. Ahh...feels so good! Now, I have always enjoyed walking, a little running and alot of swimming laps in the Gulf or in a long pool like my folks have. The gym experience has been great- I had three free meetings with a personal trainer, got my BMI done, weight and developed a really great weight training program to focus on balancing my body out- less stress on my shoulders (tension, due to kids and picking up baby stuff all day) and build a stronger back, core and legs. I know my weaknesses and am always in a better mood after a good long trip to the gym.
Here's the fun part- noticing the different types of gym rats including myself....

The Senior Getting His Kicks: down here, we have alot of retired people who are prevelant in my gym. They talk, they hang, they attend the classes, and it's a social event for them. For me, I usually have about an hour own my own, or more if I bring both kids during their daycare hours. Several times, I have noticed pretty fit older gents who sit on the chest, leg presses, slowly crunching away, blantantly staring at my chest as I do arm presses, or staring at anything under 40 who is not in a walker. These men have every right to stare, as they pay their fees like I do. So, I just stare back. Hey men! Don't be so obvious, maybe a slight quick glance at the women will do aye?
The Gym Rat: This is the person who is always there. I must know this because sometimes I go twice a day (not often but like to). THis is the person I wonder "what do they do for a living that they are always here and not at work" I'm talking 9:30 am and maybe later at 4 pm. They hang onto the equipment, take their time, socialize and have arms the size of cannons. Sometimes, their arms are so disportionately big that their legs are like little musketballs crying out "hello down here, I need some tlc please!"
The Bronzer: This is usually a woman who is so perfectly tan, it must be painted on. Her forehead is the same as the ankles, and I wonder if it ever rubs off on her pillow.
The Pro: There are many of both sexes like this at gyms - the professional body builder, and boy do they mean business. They seem to all know each other, and are really big. They wear tanks and are built like cannons, all in/out, in/out and look like they could crush you.
The Sidewayser: this is usually a guy who is just checking you out, sideways and non-offensively. Sometimes, there are the ones who get on the treadmill right next to yours even though there are ten down the aisle that are free. Why? To check out how many miles I've done? To see how high my incline is set to? to set up some non-happening conversation? Hmm..or just because all the other treadmills are in repair? I will never know, but it happens alot.
Just like when you park your new car far away at Walmart and some random person parks their car right next to yours, half a mile away from the entrance. It's a mystery.

So..that's some news from the fitness front. I am in the category of "beginner, again" or "Gym- Redux". The ones who have finally committed and are seeing results, so will not stop as it is a part of daily life now. The ones who have etched out their own time for themselves with no apologies and who are in like with themselves, later in life, and are not waiting for confirmation.

Good bodies are great, but when the mind is present, it's all in sync. I just wish no other teen girls would ever have the dubious honor of nasty hate mail to further complicate very complicated young lives.

Giving Thanks

There are major benefits of saying "thank you" and expressing gratitude in your life.
1. It helps you feel more in control. This suggests that people feel better when they take credit for the good things in their lives, according to Sonja Lyubomirsky, author of " The How of Happiness".
2. It improves your health. People who kept gratitud journals tend to be exercise more and sleep more than the average person. Also, they report more energy and vitality. (from Robert Emmons, Ph.D. author of "Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make you Happier."
3. It helps you cope better with trauma. Lyumbomirsky says that by focusing on positive gratefulness, one doesn't focus so much on negative feelings and memories from the past.
4. It bolsters self-worth and self- esteem. By being positive, one focuses more on things you value most rather than things that you want or think you need.

from "Real Simple" Nov. 08, reporting by Nykia Spradley and Lesley Alderman

So..make "thank you" a new daily habit. Everyone benefits, and if you have children, they will learn the class and grace of gratitude.

He knows nothing: and thinks he knows everything. That clearly points to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw

Spoiling the young kingdom.

Recently I saw Jamie Lee Curtis do an interview on a morning show...stay with me. She was asked about the recent death of her famous and beloved father Tony Curtis. She explained that she loved her father like her fans did, as he was distant from her family and was not really a "father", and she further explained that this was in no way negative but that it was what it was. She also said her own actress mother who raised her and her siblings, was also distant emotionally, although she was always "there." Curtis was very calm when explaining that for her generation (similar age to my parents' own parents, and perhaps yours), parents were "there" to function as parents but did not go out of their way to be "touchy feely" and that she knew her parents loved her, but there was not the hands on parenting of today. She expressed no regret at this upbringing- in fact joked about the fact that the parents of that generation would "parent" while playing cards with friends over toddies and ciggies, after giving the kids a good night kiss and off to bed you go. I personally enjoyed her opinion that parents today "over parent", that they "clap over every move" (her words) and create little people who need so much acceptance at a young age, and who need so much emotional boosting it is debilitating.
Amen. I agree. We applaud every single thing at our home since our kids are still both under four, and are doing the whole first step, first potty, first school art work thing. However, I do think there is something to be said about letting kids learn without being given stickers for every single thing, or else they are being set up for ALOT of expectations (spoiled) when they grow older. It is not "tough love" to say "that's great" for something, without all the bells and whistles kids get today...like every word they speak means they are a poet or a future scientist. Kids need to be kids, and adult parents need to retain a part of their adult world. It does not have to conflict, in fact, I have many memories of my parents having get togethers with their own friends, and we were expected to have fun playing for a while, and never were allowed to just "hang out" until 10 pm with the adults. I respect that very much about my parents, and my husband & I both share memories like this. A child had boundaries, and adults had theirs. I see parents now who allow their kids to run around like zombies at events until 11 pm and then wonder why they are having behavior issues....umm probably because, as my pediatrician told me- kids under 12 need at least 10 hours sleep to feel normal.

So...I thought this was the first person in a while to come out as a little more conservative in the parenting field. To admit that though her parents were "actors' and therefore a little more remote emotionally, she thought that she benefited from the fact that she was not allowed like a alot of child stars, to hang out until midnight with her parents, pretending to be a grown up while a child.
Kids are being raised by parents today who have alot more divorce issues, money issues, instability. Trust me, I know about these things. The one luxury we can give our children is to allow them to be kids, to allow for their flaws, and to allow them to make mistakes to learn from early in life. This is a lesson I need to remember also, as I kiss and hug my boys over every single thing they do. Stickers, rewards, toys...it all adds up to material rewards not emotional.

Enough learning...let's just all have a great night!! Life is good, lots to learn, some things better later than never.

Hello People

Wow- it's been a while. While we were off single-parenting (temporarily), seeing live music, and visiting the panhandle of Florida, I had many ideas for blog subject matter. Here are a few:

1. Why Obama needs to grow a pair to save himself and his administration. Time to tell his voters to stop being ninnies and bandwagoners and get back on his train pronto. Alas, I am not his p.r. person so I won't get to advise him of this valuable advice. Also, I am conservative- minded and would charge him for this advice in the name of capitalism. Sharing is good if it's toilet paper know what I mean?

2. Panhandle showdown- Pensacola versus Panama City: advantages of each city and what each one needs to become a major player in the future of Florida, as the available coastline properties shrink and why Six Flags over Redneck just won't be enough.

3. Interstate I-10 and why I love it. As one drives West from Tallahassee, the potholes grow and the weeds grow taller. The people get weirder and land grows hills. Once you hit Missisippi, you are back in time post Civil War, economically, for real.

4. Why I can't drink beer much anymore.

5. How having children has made us reinvent our marraige. 5 steps to stave off the old "we used to have so much fun" doldrums.

6. Why I think the slow destruction of our planet (through pollution, war, and any other horrible things) is a part of natural evolution, and how humans may wipe themselves out, but the palmetto bugs will thrive (and that's not so bad, right?)

7. Crime shows and how they make people paranoid, sad, and give couch potato sociopaths all kinds of "how-to" ideas. Thanks, CSI for showing how to kidnap, rape or build bombs.

8. Why "Dexter" is a great show. And how "Eastbound and Down" is made to raise your i.q.

9. Why Halloween shouldn't scare the Christians who avoid it. Boo! Jebediah needs to get on a witch hat and have some fun.

10. Top ten places we could live, and why we don't mind moving every few years.

11. Proper ways to feed and tend to your pet shark.

Well, I have to answer a children's whine for bedtime help. I will write again soon and look forward to friendly, self-fulfilling, one-way correspondence. Hope all of you are having a wonderful full moon October week. And, I wish all of you lots of peace this night.

Salt and Lime

Wow, how I have missed writing this lately. It's so easy to write on Facebook- little lazy comments, blurbs, postings...but this is so much more personal (to a point) and always makes me feel like I owe something to the readers.
I am not a poet, nor some great intellectual. You all know that. What I am saying is that when I write on this, I feel some responsibility to entertain or give something to the reader so their five minutes of websurfing isn't in vain.
Fear not- I still hold no great ideas!! So make a great martini and enjoy my non- intelligent blogging tonight...My family life lately has sucked any intelligence from my mind, holding it out in space for me to grasp again and pull down in the future for some great moment in blog literary history.

Here are some random thoughts of the past few weeks:

There is a Southern Baptist Minister who is criticizing the growing popularity of yoga among Christians...as a Christian who pracitices yoga, I can only assume he is scared of the rising numbers of Mid Eastern religious practitioners in the US and that he does not realize that Christianity draws from the Mithra cult practices, pre- Roman pagan practices and other "pre- Christian" beliefs ...thus he must have graduated from Auburn and never left his homeland of Alabama the beautiful, where stars fall.

Obama is gaining popularity in my own head, due to the sole fact that he favors a longer school year. True. We have considered home schooling, but only in the case of a traveling/roaming kind of lifestyle...which we could do at any moment due to Phillip's job offers. We are always discussing this.

I truly believe after being back in FL for two years that the extreme heat in Western FL makes people crazy. Really. The crime rates go up...but after that harvest moon and cooler air...everyone chills, until Christmas and the druggies need to steal stuff for their presents.

The Gators do not suck as much as people think. It's all relative. I am enjoying the whole bandwagon thing, where alot of big Gator fans are suddenly not so vocal. So...where were you during the sketchy but exciting Chris Leak years? Hiding under a rock waiting for them to have winning seasons? Where were you right after that....waiting for Danny W to show up and remind you what came before him? (Terry Dean). I love it that AL is doing so great- any SEC team that is number 1 is great, and I have to give props to alot of AL fans, they are a hell of alot classier than some of the other fans...

To end this post mercifully, I would suggest if you live in the lower 45 degree mark please sleep outside tonight. I haven't done it yet this fall, but there is nothing that makes one feel younger than camping in a tent (like Phillip and I do when possible) or just snoozing outside for a while...there is nothing more "un-suburban" than to sleep under any stars and wake up with the birds. I highly recommend it for anyone who can..if you have kids- just lock them up safely, bring out your phone/baby monitors and snooze away for 7 hours...(on your patio or outdoor chairs). Your kids will wonder why you look so happy that morning. It will utterly change the way your day starts, and you may want to do it again.

Well, good night friends, old and new...far and very far away.
I think of all of you often, and hope that everyone is taking care of themselves and realize how important they are in this world.

Love, JLynn

F Scott Fitzgerald

A little salt and lime:

Forgotten is forgiven.

Genius is the ability to put into effect what is in your mind.

Her body calculated to a millimeter to suggest a bud but yet guarantee a flower.

For a while, after you quit Keats, all other poetry seems to be only whistling or humming. ( I agree)...JM

In a real dark night of the soul, it is always three o'clock in the morning, day after day.

Personality is an unbroken series of succesful gestures.

Thank you, Fitz... I almost named my second child after you, but thought the better of it after deciding it was best not to have ignorant people taunting my son while he perhaps dreamed of writing and highballs..something they would never understand in this sometimes intolerant world.

Some Lime

Love is not something that someone Does For You, but rather something that passes between two people like a tide - building, receding, and always bringing something up from the deep.

a few more "best movies"

I am adding "Sideways", being a rather sweet, very adult and unusual take on romance that really stands out as a well written comedy/romance/drama with some of the most unforgettable quotes and scenes.
I am also adding " The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"- one of the most best film adaptations of a book...but so much more- philosophy, Alan Rickman, high brow humour, intellectual tongue in cheekness and a truly fresh film that was a nice antedote to the rather "big" but dour films like "Babel" and "Crash" of our last decade.
All Harry Potter movies except the first two that were a little too "G Rated" compared to the rest. ;)

Guilty pleasures...part 5 maybe??

I have written many posts before about guilty pleasures of television in my personal life. Now that we have very limited television I am going to tell you what good shows are on if you only run on antennae and or the whole Netflix/Wii service that we have. This service has been great, you get series such as "American Pickers", "Anthony Bourdain" and many other cable shows. On the downside, you get hundreds of B/C list movies that you may not have ever heard of to choose from: this can be quite "ok" if you are like us and can barely find time to have two hours to watch a movie. we have seen some doozies, and seen some interesting movies like "The Last Winter" (check it out).
Here is a list of some of the best television/cable channels have to offer, including public broadcasting:
Austin City Limits
American Pickers
Nova
Pawn Stars (we may have to wait for this on our Wii deal)
Dexter (caught up on three seasons using Wii)
the "Create" public channel- brought to us down here by USF- wonderful variety of food, travel and crafting shows all with an updated look
Bones- (Fox); the weird thing about Fox is that although their news departments drive people crazy, they have always been ahead of the game creatively with some of their shows (21 Jump Street, X-Files, The Simpsons, The Family Guy and Bones). I love Bones!!
Guilty Pleasure: American Idol- now we don't watch each season and watch every performer, but sometimes we'll catch this a few weeks in a row by accident, and it really does remind you of a big national talent show, which it is supposed to be, without all the sponsorship and cheesiness. It is fun to see people from small towns get their five minutes of fame or shame try to make it big and I just like seeing people perform live, period.

I would endorse reading literature or even doing crosswords every night rather than watching tv, but if you must...enjoy it! Mindless entertainment is great especially when it's not full of violence or uber depressing content.

We have enough of that in the real world.

The Welcome Stranger, Rain.

There is nothing more satisfying than big fat steady raindrops pounding your home and land after weeks of hot dry drought weather. It is happening right now in Dunedin FL. I was outside about one hour ago, talking on the phone, after watering our wilting plants when I saw it- Lightning. However, this is sometimes a false prophet. Lightning visits our neighborhood often, but since we live only a few miles from the Gulf Coast, it travels through a lonely soul, with no rain to show for all it's fierce intensity. The rain here usually collects more inland, towards Tampa Bay and surrounding areas east of our area. We are grateful for it tonight, a sweet loud reprieve from the constant high and dry temps (upper 90's) and no relief.

So, what are you up to tonight old friends? What was your weekend like? Did you enjoy some favorite music, film, or book? Did you dig into some great food among loved ones? Did you take care of your family and/or friends? Did you take care of yourself?

Oh, someone is up--- the crazy thunder has gotten Nick up. Knowing him, he has fallen asleep behind his door, not in his bed. We check on him every single night around this time to make sure he is actually in his bed....
talk to you later friends!

ok- a top 13 list of my faves from the past decade

"The Road" - the best novel adaptation, and the best apocalyptic film I have ever seen. Loved the intense but spare dialogue between father and "the boy", and the overwhelming sense of landscape
"The Hurt Locker" - the most intense war movie, on a microcosmic scale - the complete opposite of wide, sweeping drama ala' "The Thin Red Line" or "Saving Private Ryan"
"Atonement" - brutal, beautiful, drama, war and another message- how lives play out. Surprise ending noone sees comming. Trust me. I don't even want to see it again, but it's like a trophy you place high on a shelf, full of pride that you were there to witness the event.
"O Brother Where Art Thou?" - humour mixed with political statements about the South and great adaptation of ancient poetry
"The Big Lebowski" - again, humour mixed with alot of racial and class statements
"Gran Torino" - classy, direct, great story telling by Clint Eastwood and cast
"Donnie Darko" - I could watch this a hundred times and still wonder...
"Gosford Park" - forgot this was in this decade- incredible Robert Altman "who done it"
"Pan's Labryinth"- the most haunting war movie I have ever seen
"Momento" - Christopher Nolans first "popular" movie, "Following" was neat, but low on emotional connectiveness
"The Royal Tenenbaums" - fun, eccentric, not for everyone kind of film...like a play on-screen. A work of art for set direction, character, and dialogue (not too much plot but that works out for this film)
"No Country for Old Men" - good versus....evil, really? Good versus....what we think of evil or that we tempt evil and it comes to visit when we choose unwisely. In this movie, the "devil" only shows up when messed with. Unforgettable!
"Two Lovers"- a very intense Joaquin Phoenix film about ...two lovers he must choose from, but so much more. If you think it's a chick flick, you are wrong. Watch it, discuss. Straightforward life choices ahead. Very well made.

Jude vs the Vacuum

Right now, my little nugget of joy is stalking and sizing up the tall vacuum like a pitbull sizing up a tall human. We have 10 minutes to go until his 12 month doctor's appointment. Shots, yeah! I haven't been able to write alot lately but hope to tonight before company comes in and my privacy for writing is on hold for a small while...that's ok, we are so happy they are comming to visit!
How are you this morning? When you woke up, were you immediately happy or does it come slowly out of a sleep induced fog? Or, if you're like me, did that full moon of last night pretty much make your house seem like the moon is pretty much sitting on your couch, casting his white glow on every inch of your home, making it too bright for sleeping??
I will get through it, and so will you brothers...
have a wonderful day and hold onto the good stuff.

gym rats and me

Today, I had my first session with a professional personal trainer. Yikes! We talked about my weaknesses, my strengths, went over my diet, my BMI, my heartrate, my blood pressure and all the good stuff. The trainer showed me several machines to use and we experimented with them all, doing several reps to make sure I was doing them correctly and she even took film footage of my walking to show me how to "walk better". It as amazing to hear all the information she gathered. Some of it not so positive, but alot of positives- I am very strong, have alot of endurance, super flexible ( I already knew that from yoga) and my heart health is great. My biggest goal is work more of my back and core muscles for posture and to lose about 45 pounds. This is alot of weight, but we are going to do it within 3 months. I will keep you posted on this new challenge that I am very excited about. Cannot wait to be leaner and meaner!

On another note, I am going to post something soon about all the different kinds of people you find in gyms. It is interesting and great for people watching. Also, hand sanitizer is my new friend.
Ciao baby!

What do you want to do, young friend?

I wrote a huge post for this, with article quotes and all. But, neither the article nor the post represented my true feelings about the topic.
All I am going to write tonight is this (after writing 5 paragraphs of storylines earlier then deleting):
"You don't write because you want to say something, you write because you have something you want to say:
F. Scott Fitzgerald.
My favorite modern literature lad.

Do I really love my son? (title from Salon article posted below)

Dear Salt & Lime friends, if you are a parent or have friends who are new parents, this article is a lightbulb moment. Either way it's great reading! I love it when people write honestly about life, without feeling like they must only protray the best moments, as if life is always perfect. Great writing, although some hostile and supportive commentary follows it..

Do I really love my son?

Good Morning students!

Yet another day dropping off the child at school. I got reprimanded like a 10 year old by a staff member, who thought I was holding up the drive through line. But I wasn't, I swear teacher! She didn't understand that Nick is only 3.5 and has to wait until his teacher comes to get him out of the car (this is done with all pre-k kids for safety reasons). This process is done within about 5 seconds and there are two lanes for people to drive around you.

You're holding up the line, ma'am! Umm..please don't get my Irish temper going at 8am, it's not pleasant and I don't let it out often. In fact, it's been exiled to a far off cave in a far off island and only if bears come around to poke at it, does it come out raging. Don't poke the bear.

I need a bagel and coffee...you guys have a great day out there in the real world! It's a good day to be alive, even though some days begin better than others - I'm grateful for each grumpy morning.

Austin City Limits

Look, there's alot of crap to write about, and although it's all up in my head, I cannot always find the time to write about everything I think about. So forgive me, dear friends. It's not like I dont' know you have other things to do than read this crappy blog of mine.
Smiling....

SO, on Austin City Limits tonight, after all the football hoopla, My Morning Jacket was performing. Now, I am a new fan of theirs. I have heard of them, but with music the way it is now a days, speaking as an old fart, you have to do your research and not rely on some music "channel" to let you know what bands are cool or what to check out. As it has been the past years, we just try to forage through music sites and online zines to see the latest and greatest.
"My Morning Jacket" put on a great show. It was chillin, laid back, at times zippy, at times trippy. It had the current theme- the big full beard frontman, the crazy thin guy on keyboard, the wailing long haired dude on drums...but all in all their music was very nice, live. That's the key, live. I loved their somewhat old school "Chicago, Framton- like" style. But I had the clear thought that they would rather be seen as more "Phish" or "grateful Dead" style...they need to accept their true tone. Or, maybe their self-perception is just not my reality ;)
I truly like their music, their vibe. It is suitable for a long afternoon or a drive. They are clearly talented, and I can appreciate their various talent on different instruments. They tried hard during this live performance, to showcase their wide range of talent, and it was successful. I would suggest that the vocals, so high and tenor-ish, may not be for everyone, even myself who tends to like deeper voices, and growly rock. This is not music for someone who wants to "rock out" rather for someone who wants to "veg out". And both are ok by me. No details on songs or writers yet..I haven't had time yet tonight to sit more than 5 minutes at a time...such is life with two kids and phone calls to take care of!
Hope you are having a wonderful night. Life is never perfect - but moments can be. Please take a moment to put aside any cynicism you may have to remember those who lost their lives on Sept 11. It was such a big moment for me, just in the situation I was in at work (media) and how crazy it was afterwards...details like Tyndall being cordoned off with machine gun bearing men, and not being able to talk to my fiance for hours not knowing if anything had happened at their base. Little things compared to people going to work and getting blown up, or put into the ground as in PA or the Pentagon. People forget, or seem to want to forget..I don't understand this mentality. Why do so many Americans hate themselves, or feel unworthy of feeling patriotic? I have come to believe because there is no modern Vietnam, that some of our current generation must find reasons to "rebel" against their upper middle class Christian families for some reason, maybe in order to find purpose? I don't know, I get curious about this new facet of our society, but then I was like them for a brief moment in college, before I joined the real working world. I just wish people would give more respect to the country they live and work in.. if you don't like it- there are plenty of European countries that would be happy to take your American dollars.

Really, in the end, there are still some great bands going on here...Music- the last frontier.

Existentialism- a very brief summary

I am reading a book called "Ideas that Matter- The Concepts That Shape the 21st Century" by A.C. Grayling. It has been a great way to re-educate myself on the type of things you discover in formal education but tend to lose every day use of when you are surrounded by mundane domestic life or friends who don't really have time to discuss concepts that matter.
The book covers in neat little chapters, everything from nationalism, Luddites, Nazism, idealism, Judaism, Laissez-faire economics (my fave), logic, creationism, humanism, etc. It's a great reference book for ancient and modern religions, theories, science breakthoughs, modern economic processes, and even archeological finds that are important to our current civilization.
Anyway, I stumbled upon the idea of "Existentialism" which I have summarized below:

" 'Absurdity' is the key notion applied by existentialists to the human condition, meaning by it that there is no extrinsic meaning, purpose or value to human existence: it is 'absurd' in being wholly accidental and in itself pointless. As Camus put it ..."Man stands face to face with the irrational. He feels within him his longing for happiness and for reason. The absurd is born of this confrontation between the human need and unreasonable silience of the world'.
But this chracterization is not intended to be...so badly stated, pessimistic or nihilistic. Rather, it is the starting point for the claim that individuals must, in repsonse, create meaning in their lives by asserting the value of freedom, creativity, and love, and attributing dignity to human beings thus condemned to be self creating and self- valorizing. This is the basis of Existentialism. (This is also the root of the saying "the theater of the absurd" by Camus and is also found in works by Samual Beckett, Jean Genet and Pinter, whose characters are troubled and displaced, not attached to the a world that seems menacing to them...( this is because they have not taken it upon themselves to find meaning in the world that is indifferent to them; they must place themselves in the world, and creat their own purpose rather than waiting for the world to deem them worthy, or wait on another human to give them purpose).

Existentialism come svery close to atheist point of view that whatever meaning attaches to human existence is found in it or imposed on it by human beings themselves....because there is no purpose established for man 'outside'. Existentialism takes it a step further to include love, freedom dignity and creativity, to man's meaning, though Sartre describes the possesion of 'free will' as agony because it forces us to make choices in the face of existence's utter emptiness. But existentialism allows for 'authenticity' which means living according to one's beliefs, taking responsibility for the consequences of one's actions, and accepting the agonies of one's own freedom."

In a nutshell, this idea speaks to me, it is how I have viewed life for a long long time. That is why I get frustrated with people who cannot seem to take responsibility for their own actions, and tend to seek blame for their mistakes. On the other hand, I have to realize I can only be watchful of my own, and if we would all allow that our actions are our own, people may treat each other with more respect and be filled with more pride and dignity.

thanks, and a have a great Sunday. I have a second load of laundry to do, and then checking out our backyard for weeds and other varmits.

Salt

..I think, most presidents would have a hard time figuring out how to handle such an unprecendented event (Gulf Oil Spill), however in this day and age, it's hard to find people who will question anything.... and that in itself, is the beginning of the demise of this great country. People compare our US to the fall of Rome, yes, it is if we continue to condemn people who question any leader- even the ever so popular Barack Obama. It was ok to question Clinton and Bush, but not today's leader? why? Are you afraid of being called a racist? I've realized alot of people are very afraid, now, to speak up for what they want. And what they would like to question. If they voted for Obama, they are still afraid to question him. Why? If race isn't the answer, then what are they afraid of?
Fear is only set by others. You can react to their fear, or not react. I learned the past few years, that to react is to make others attack, and this raises more questions. Why so ready to attack? Why not talk about what the problems are and not attack others? Why not get so defensive because some don't like the current leader? Why even try to act like a peace loving person when you are angry, devisive and narrow minded? Or, maybe you are wanting peace among us all, but you find it hard to find the right way to communicate because of all the hateful dialogue on tv...and so you demure, and you don't let people know you're true feelings. Perhaps you don't give damn, God, I wish I was one of those. How easy not to care. How truly peaceful life would be... really. I admire those. I just cannot be one, it's not in my nature.

Find your voice, but realize we don't have to argue. We do not have to hate. We can talk, we can share information like some of my friends do on FB, where we share, argue a little but still respect each other. For some, this has been hard. I have had people argue and they solicit comments but really don't want to hear them at all. I find this passive aggressive style not at all positive or worth anything - they are looking for a fight, they throw out the bait, and then try to wrestle you to the ground with their dogma. There is no fun discussion, they just think they're right, so it's no fun, and they end up hurting feelings and look like jerks.

Do be open, do be kind. There are all types out there. Most are happy, most are secure in their beliefs, most would like to share a little, talk a little, but most don't want to be talked down to by some superior minded person who has an entitlement issue in their own mind.

yes, Mr. Thoreau

"Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it." Henry David Thoreau.

Young Voters Not Feeling the Democratic 'Vibe' Much Anymore

Young Voters Not Feeling the Democratic 'Vibe' Much Anymore

morning has broken...

cereal on the floor, milk to clean up, one child looking at me right now and smiling and one grunting and playing with his shoebox full of matchbox cars, waiting for the time when we put his shoes on and we all drive to his school. The sun has finally risen- it's hard getting up lately when the time change has yet to occur and the mornings invite long sleep ins. Who has those? I'm jealous. Oh how I took for granted the days of sleeping half a morning and feeling good all day!

On another note, we saw on the news how they are selling condos in Miami for under $60 Grand. Hello! The extra costs, of course, are the condo fees and insurance. Still.... anyone up for some hot pressed Cubans and salsa music in the air? We went there two years ago and fell in love with it. I had always thought of it as some nasty, crime ridden place ala Miami Vice but it was beautiful, artsy, full of great food and international flair. South Beach was wonderful, the my fave spot was Coconut Grove area. Anyway, for price of two cars, you can get a condo there..
just putting a bug in your ear!!

Well, time to take Dominick to school, then the gym,then doing a tutoring session tonight. Speaking of Miami, we're getting some new "Dexter" epis in the mail today! Hooray for grisley twisted fictional crime shows!

my PSA for the month- after that more pointless fun stuff

Friends, I have to tell you that this morning started with a WTF moment- I turn on our local news for about 1/2 hour while we get ready to take Nick to school and there was a new oil rig explosion. My heart sunk. Then- no lives lost, no oil leaking (supposedly since it was an inactive rig). Then I thought- but what were those men working on? Why the hasty news writing it off so quickly. After this point, I had no time to think...of to school, driving through a drop -off circle for my first born Nashville Vanderbilt child who I love so much it hurts.

I drove onward with Jude in the other child's seat, onto the causeway, to enjoy the cooler temps at 8:30 am. We checked out the "bumpy side" - all limestone rocks (popular down here) and saw the homeless guy who isnt' really homeless hanging around his cat he lives on...he has seen me so many times and someday I am going to talk to him. He's got blonde hair bleached from the sun and skin like a alligator purse but he sure does always look happy to me. Jude and I hung out for an hour, me laying in a chair and him tucked in his stroller in the shade facing me away from the rising hot sun. by 10 - time to go home and stay in the a/c for while.

My point is- there is no time like the present to see if there is anything at all you can personally do for our Gulf of Mexico. If you look online, there are countless groups that help wildlife, that need supplies for cleaning animals (this is still going on in LA btw, even if the news hasn't reported it that much anymore), and there are groups that just go out and clean up tons of trash. I have seen them weekly, in orange pullovers- volunteer groups who pick up water bottles, plastic and trash that people leave behind.

This is about responsibility. And about doing something, even little things, if you can. I have picked up bags of other people's trash here in Dunedin, and this is considered a very eco-friendly type of community. I don't doubt people consider themselves that, but they still leave a heap of trash behind. The beaches are beautiful here because volunteers help clean up before you hit the shoreline with your family.

I'm not big on guilt trips. I dont like the media informing me of things we should already know, and usually do. I am big on doing things I know are right.

Do something, anything, about cleaning up the Gulf. This is my only PSA for the week. I promise.

PTAPTAPTAPTAPTA. Lather, Rinse, and Repeat

Today, my husband and I turned in our fees to join the PTA of our son's school. I think that's enough news for this hour, and enough for me to chew on, personally, for a while. I'll write again tonight, after my grizzlies are in bed and my head is clear (er). I hope my old and new friends out there are doing well, and having a day of great highs, and small lows. Later, kiddos.

I self -censored myself, and it felt great!

Early this morning, I wrote a post that upon later reading, was totally not on point, totally not clear, and totally could have been misconstrued. I deleted myself. The post was bad, it was written too early in the morning (around 6:30 am while my kids were eating breakfast) and it did not contain the right words for my point. This does not happen often. When you see what I have written here on this blog, it's on purpose. I do not apologize as a writer however badly written my thoughts come tumbling out. Or on good days, come out precisely as how I meant them, which is most of the posts. There are too many times in this modern life where people feel they must apologize for their true expressive thoughts, and this blog is not that place for me. It is one of my places of content and discontent. The others are more private and we like it that way. (facebook doesn't count- I dont actually talk alot about my true feelings about anything on it- just commentary on fleeting posts, opinions, and soliticited advice). This post did not say enough about my true feelings, and the content was a general thought, and did not do justice to my true original idea. So- it is deleted. I stand corrected, by myself- the best way for a writer to be corrected...wink wink.

Who are you...who who who who.

No, I haven't read "A History of White People" yet. I am still on the second Steig Larrson trilogy ("The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo") so as to catch up before the American movies are made. Also, I checked out "The best American Poetry of 2009" from the library. I used to buy those every year since 1990, but since I only like about half the poems, realized it was smarter to read them for the 2 weeks allotted for free, and do with them what i like before returning. Modern poetry is just as "all over the place" as any poetry from the 1600's. Every poet is either writing about a world inside their mind, or writing about the world as they see it (Wallace was this way, and I love that about him- he was called "the first urban poet" by a commentator on PBS recently, and supposedly Jack Kerouack's 'Howl' poem was inspired by him).

So, this mystery is not solved. This "A History of White People" may remain a legend in my mind...the author still unGoogled, a summary yet unread...I leave alot of stuff unturned using the internet because really, doesn't that ruin life sometimes? Knowing everything?? Finding anything without doing it yourself?
When I read it, I'll let you know. Until then, we'll be content with "A History of Us", written by unnamed, unknown scholars who think they know us all, and know all, and who have written our history for all of us, regardless of race..and we will go on reading and believing what we read and be ok with that. And really, we are, aren't we? Who has time for all that researching and the questions- oy!