little things

I was going to write something meaningful, something deep, something with a sense of hip-ness, but then about twenty minutes ago, my son Dominick walked out into our living room like a towheaded apparition and announced he needed to go potty. This has been a work in progress for over half a year. He's getting really good at it, and we're very happy for him.
Life was getting easier, until he decided that getting up and telling us he needed to go potty was a great ploy to staying up just a little later. This time, I laughed outloud for the first time, giggling uncontrollably as he turned and grinned at us, knowing his plan was working. Going to bed at 7 has worked for a very long time. Only now, it's not dark at 7 pm. Most days, he's tired from school and it works out. This week, I saw his wheels turning and his mind using the excuse for potty time (with no outcome) as an excuse for getting out of bed.

"He's your son" my husband of 7 years says.
Yes, yes he is. God bless him. He'll play dumb when it's fun, but he'll play games when he's bored.

Yes, he's my son. Jude may be our golden skinned, smiling, bonny McMullen (Scottish) boy totally from my mom's side of the family, but Nick is the mix of my father, my husband and me- defiant, stubborn, mischevious, and always the devil's advocate.

Having children is the craziest thing any human could ever decide to do. Really. It goes against every common sense thought one could have. But it's a decision to take on with one hundred ten percent open arms, or else you never ever catch up.

Sometimes, we need to catch up. Parents have to do that at times. No one ever tells you how hard it is. Maybe some people have it easy- I don't know, have no way of comparing really. I never know if other moms are telling me their truths about raising their kids or if they are sugar coating things like people do.

Kids are hard, but they are amazing creatures who reflect ourselves. They need us to stand up for them, to teach them, to remember our own childhood fears and joys.

And- to know that the "potty" years won't last forever...only a few more years of Walmart and I will never step foot in that place again!!