"Legions" - a food metaphor review

"Legions" (2010) directed by Scott Charles Stewart and stars Dennis Quaid, Paul Bettany, some tv show lady and a whole lotta angry angels..who are like zombies...who are also like vampires and ogres. Never mind. It's supposed to be about the whole Gabriel vs. Michael fight when God is very mad as us bad, selfish humans. It starts off good, and I love Paul Bettany- who in this movie is like some classically trained theater Brit stuck in a tv drama about bad angels. And he does look confused the whole time like "what am I doing this for?? Oh yeah, baby diapers."

Here is my food metaphor review: "Legions" is sorta like those "Totino's" pizzas one can find for about $1.50 in the frozen pizza section. It's weird, full of holes, has fake bits of toppings, smells funny, is cheap and tricks you into something that it is most definitely not - that is good, tasty and leaves you satisfied.